Soften Into Self-Love with this 3-Step Process for Self-Compassion (Guided Meditation)
Soften Into Self-Love with This 3-Step Process for Self-Compassion
Self-love is a phrase that gets used everywhere, but so often it feels out of reach. We’re told to “love ourselves,” but what does that actually mean in practice? How do you create a relationship with yourself that feels real and lived, rather than another lofty goal to strive for?
From a somatic healing perspective, self-love isn’t just a thought or an affirmation. It’s a way of being with yourself that shows up in your nervous system, in your emotions, and in the small choices you make moment by moment. And the most powerful pathway into this kind of embodied self-love is self-compassion.
When you bring compassion to yourself, your whole inner landscape begins to change. Your nervous system softens, your body feels safer, and your inner voice starts to speak with more gentleness. Little by little, love stops being an abstract concept and becomes something you can actually feel inside.
Why Self-Compassion Heals
Many of us were taught to meet our struggles with criticism or pressure, as though harshness would make us stronger. Yet what actually brings about healing is presence and care.
From a somatic perspective, compassion signals to the nervous system that we are safe. Instead of bracing against pain or rejecting our own experience, we create room for what is here to be held. This gentle holding quiets the stress response in the brain and allows emotions to move through the body rather than get stored as tension or shame.
Self-compassion is also profoundly humanizing. It reminds us that our imperfections and wounds don’t make us unworthy, they simply make us part of the human family. And when we relate to ourselves in this way, we begin to grow a relationship with ourselves that is steady and trustworthy. This is the soil where authentic self-love grows.
About This Guided Self-Compassion Meditation
This meditation is designed to be both soothing and deeply effective. It gently guides you into a more compassionate relationship with yourself while also helping your nervous system find calm and ease. As you move through the practice, you’ll notice how your body begins to soften, your mind grows quieter, and a sense of self-kindness becomes more accessible.
At the heart of this meditation is a powerful tool: iffirmations.
Iffirmations are a more powerful and authentic form of affirmations. They work by priming the subconscious mind for curiosity, creative problem solving, and openness to new possibilities. Instead of trying to convince yourself of something that feels false, you create an iffirmation by adding the words “what if” to an affirmation or intention. This subtle shift makes the statement feel expansive and genuine in your body, rather than forced.
Unlike affirmations, which can sometimes feel like toxic positivity or bypass the truth of your current experience, iffirmations create a gentle bridge between where you are and where you want to be. They help dissolve resistance, nurture intrinsic motivation, and invite compassion for the places inside that feel stuck or doubtful. In this way, they become a playful and profound way to move forward—without the sugary sweet lies of traditional positive thinking.
The 3 Steps to Self-Compassion
This meditation will gently guide you through three simple steps, each one helping you soften more deeply into a compassionate relationship with yourself.
Step 1: Find a part within that needs more self-love or self-compassion
We begin by turning inward and noticing what part of you most needs care in this moment. It might be a tender place that feels small or unsure, or simply a quiet longing for gentleness. By allowing this part to come into awareness, you offer it recognition and say, “I see you, and you matter.”
Step 2: Normalize and humanize your feelings (with iffirmations)
Once you’ve named what you are feeling, we use iffirmations to remind you that these emotions are part of being human. You are not alone in them. This step helps dissolve shame and softens the sense of isolation that so often accompanies struggle, opening the door to belonging and compassion.
Step 3: Soften toward yourself and your feelings (with iffirmations)
Finally, we invite a tender stance toward whatever is present. Using iffirmations, you practice meeting yourself with care and warmth rather than judgment. In this step, compassion becomes something you can actually feel in your body—a gentle turning inward that says, “I am worthy of kindness, even here.”
Through these three steps, self-compassion begins to take root, not as an abstract idea but as a lived experience.
Letting Self-Love Become Real
Self-love is not about striving to feel a certain way. It’s about creating a compassionate relationship with yourself, one moment at a time. Each time you pause and offer yourself kindness, you strengthen the pathway of self-love within your nervous system.
Over time, these moments of compassion weave together into something steady and trustworthy. They remind you that you are worthy of care. They help you feel more at home in your body, more connected to your heart, and more able to live from a place of authenticity.
This is how love becomes real: not by trying to force it, but by softening into it.
Try the 3-Step Process for Self-Compassion Meditation now!
Episode timing:
00:00 - How self-compassion helps us soften into real self-love
03:42 - 3-Step Process for Self-Compassion (Guided Meditation)
23:55 - Conclusion
3-Step Process for Self-Compassion
1 - Find a part within you that needs more self-love or self-compassion.
Where do you sense this part the most within or around you?
Is it more on the right or the left?
Is it more deep or superficial?
How big is it or how much space does it take up within or around you?
Notice the height, width, thickness, and shape.
What color is it?
How would you describe it? What descriptive words would fit?
What else do you notice about this part?
2 - Iffirmations to normalize and humanize your feelings:
What if it’s okay to feel this way right now?
What if lots of people feel like this sometimes?
What if there’s nothing wrong with me for feeling this way?
What would it feel like to stop fighting with my feelings?
What would it be like to just accept my feelings right now?
What if my reaction here actually makes sense in a way?
Of course I feel this way because …
3 - Iffirmations to soften towards yourself:
What if I can soften my heart towards myself right now?
What would it be like to soften my heart toward my feelings right now?
What if I can start to accept myself where I am and as I am?
What would it be like to acknowledge what I’m really feeling right now and love myself anyway?
What if I can love and accept myself even when I’m feeling this way?
What if I can love and accept myself especially when I’m feeling this way?
Who would I become if I could release my self-judgment and foster self-understanding instead?
What if I can become a steady source of love and compassion in my life?
What if I can be patient with myself?
What if self-compassion is my best route forward?
What if I truly and deeply deserve compassion?
What if I truly and deeply deserve compassion, because …
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Space is limited! ✨
How did you enjoy that 3-Step Process for Self-Compassion?
How do you feel now? And what has shifted within?
Please let me know in the comments!
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And please join me every Friday on this beautiful journey out of your head, and into your more embodied and authentic self. 🩷🩷🩷
Thanks so much for joining me today!
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Enjoy more like this: Self-Compassion Exercises, Somatic Emotional Processing, Embodied Self-Love Series
About me
Hey, I’m Karena!
I’m a somatic emotional healing coach here to help you quickly identify and heal the subconscious blocks, old emotional wounds and self-sabotaging core beliefs that are holding you back!
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